Discipline

Is spanking effective?
Spanking is a very controversial form of discipline. It is more of a judgement call based on the family's beliefs than anything else. However, according to Dr. Spock spanking should only be used for children 1-5 years old, should be done with an open hand, and should only be given on the buttocks, legs, or hands. It is also recommended that you only swat the child once to discipline and that spanking should not be used to punish an aggressive child. There are better ways to discipline that will help your child be successful later in their development. The first thing is that everyone involved in disciplining the child need to agree on what form of discipline they are going to use. Having consistency will prevent confusion for everyone involved. Parents must then set clear rules explaining why the rules are needed. Punishment should be delivered as soon as possible and should relate to the crime if possible. This will teach the child to take responsibility for their actions. For example, if a child colors on the wall, make them clean the wall as punishment. Time-out for younger children, and taking away a privilege for older ones, are effective methods of punishment. However, a child should only be in time-out one minute for each year of life. It is also important for care givers to reward the child when the child is following rules and exhibiting good behavior because this helps the child learn what is expected of them.

What is the best way to handle a tantrum?
Temper tantrums are a natural part of a child's development. Children between the ages of 2-5 cannot always express themselves verbally leading to them throwing a tantrum. Although tantrums differ from one child to another, there are certain times when tantrums are more likely. Children who are bored, hungry, sick, tired, or in an unusual atmosphere are more prone to become frustrated resulting in a tantrum. Parents should pay attention to when and where tantrums take place to see if a pattern develops. When a child does throw a tantrum the parent must stay calm. Getting angry or hostile themselves will only make things worse. The best way to handle things is to ignore the child and walk away. Another suggestion is to isolate the child in a safe and quiet place where they will not have an audience. In public it is important to remember not to bribe or give in to the child because this will teach them they can get what they want. If a child throws a tantrum in public the best thing to do is to pick the child up and carry them outside where they will be isolated from others.

What should I do if my child steals?
The first thing a parent must understand about stealing is that some kids do not know stealing is wrong. A child under the age of five probably does not realize that they are not supposed to do it. When a child does steal it is important for the parent to explain that it is wrong and the parent should help the child either pay for or return the object. Children steal for many reasons including attention, anger towards a parent, to show bravery, or to be accepted by friends. If you feel your child has stolen for attention make sure to let them know you love them and do not favor one sibling over another. If you teach your child that stealing is unacceptable your child should stop stealing as they mature and realize it is wrong. If your child continues to steal there is probably an underlying reason and a mental health professional could be helpful.

back